A Wedding Story
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A few days after Italy opened up to tourists again in June, my husband and I received an invitation to a small wedding on the island of Ischia. A dear friend’s son was getting married, after postponing the wedding twice due to the pandemic. My husband and I looked at each other and said “let’s go!” He hadn’t been on a plane for nearly two years, I had flown once in March to visit my 92-year-old mother. We made plans- both vaccinated, booked a Delta covid flight- you must show proof of vaccination and/or have a negative test to fly. On the return to the U-S we needed a negative covid test before boarding the flight home. We will get another test in the next three days following CDC recommendations.
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As I write this the Italian government will require (starting August 6th) a “green” pass to dine at indoor restaurants, go to sporting events and other indoor public activities. To get a pass Italians must have proof of at least one vaccine dose in the last nine months, have recovered from COVID-19 in the last six months or a negative test in the last 48 hours.
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Being out in the world again shows us how much the world has changed.
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The wedding itself was magical- sweeter somehow in the wake of all we’ve been through. The events took place outside, or in well-ventilated tents. Rain started to fall during the rehearsal dinner- we continued on- waiters brought umbrellas- as guests dumped rainwater off dinner plates and kept eating soggy yet still fantastic pasta. Napkins, hair and dresses dripping- deepening the connection of those around the table. The young man seated next to me and I took turns holding a shared umbrella so the other could eat without raindrops splashing the plate. The bride designed her own dress and works for an international fashion designer, as did some of her friends. One chic woman I sat across from whose sleek brown hair managed to stay dry, told me the designer she had worked for lost her business during the pandemic. “Maybe we don’t need all that anymore- all the stuff” she said wistfully in a Catalan accent. She and her husband and two young sons were visiting her parents in Spain last year when global lockdowns began- instead of returning to their life in NYC, they stayed in Spain where the schools remained open. She has reevaluated life- in New York she would get home at 10p at night from work and barely see her children. Life has slowed way down. She and her husband have learned to be better parents. Her sons know their grandparents better and now also speak Catalan. They are preparing to return to NYC as schools reopen.
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Throughout Southern Italy folks wear masks without any politics or rancor. It is simply if you enter an establishment where there are other people you do not know, you have a mask on. Being hit hard by the pandemic in the early stages, Italians took steps and listened to science.
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At the reception I was seated next to a middle aged woman from the San Francisco Bay area who told me she was not vaccinated. I was taken aback, but curious about her decision. She also is part of a group of right-wing Christians who believe Donald Trump is the chosen one destined to save the United States. I listened, stunned- but like an unfolding train wreck I couldn’t turn away from her distortions. She believes our last presidential election was stolen despite the lack of any evidence. I knew enough not to try to convince her otherwise- studies show that once someone has made up their mind about conspiracy theories any attempt to convince them causes them to dig in deeper. That’s what happened when my husband joined our conversation! I will spare you the details- but you already know them- we are deeply divided. Our country is at a dangerous place.
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Back to Italy, we know tourist dollars, especially in the agricultural South, contribute (anywhere from 10-17%) of the economy.
At a stopover in Ravello a merchant told me there are typically 300-400 international weddings held in the small town a year- English, German, Australian, American- during lockdown not one took place.
We are living through this experience- all of us changed- yet it rings true even more- we need each other. We must continue to find ways- with our shared humanity- to bridge our differences.
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Today, we stand on the edge of the 2021 opening Olympic Games- one without any in-person fans- let’s remember - “a rising tide lifts all the boats.”
